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May 2012 | June 2012 |

this is me.. and i want to change it.
pengalaman~
Lets turn another chapter~
For NOW
pasal Benda tue..
buddies like forever~
dalam diam
to little me

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this is me.. and i want to change it.
Written at Thursday, 7 June 2012 | back to top



Nafsu Lawwamah.
~ Menyedari diri sering terlibat dengan dosa.
~ Menyesali dosa dan sering mencela diri.
~ Ketika berbuat dosa, ia lalai dengan kenikmatan dosa itu tanpa memikirkan akibatnya.
~ Selepas buat dosa, baru timbul rasa penyesalan. Namun keadaan itu hanya seketika, ia akan kembali melakukan dosa apabila ada godaan dan hasutan.
~ Selalu ‘perasan’ dengan kebaikannya. Merasakan diri sudah baik.
~ Mudah dihinggapi rasa riya’ (menunjuk-nunjuk) dan ‘ujub (bangga diri) apabila melakukan kebaikan.
~ Tidak berbangga dengan dosa dan tidak pula mengajak orang lain melakukan dosa.
~ Suka ditegur malah suka menghadiri majlis-majlis ilmu.
~Hatinya mudah tersentuh apabila diberi peringatan-peringatan iman namun sangat rapuh apabila digoda maksiat.

*Nafsu sebegini masih belum stabil. Insan yang memilikinya memang suka melakukan kebaikan namun belum merasa kemanisan kebaikan tersebut dengan sebetul-betulnya. Kadang-kadang dirinya mudah tergoda dan terperangkap dengan nafsu. Namun, penyesalan itu akan timbul selepas berbuat dosa. Menyesal atas sikap dirinya yang terlalu lemah. 



"dan aku bersumpah dengan jiwa yang amat menyesali (dirinya sendiri)." [75:2]

sekadar peringatan bagi diri ini..dan juga yang lain~


pengalaman~
Written at Tuesday, 5 June 2012 | back to top

with the name of Allah,


ok, want to know what happened kemarin-kemarin? Yes? then follow and read me until the end of the storeyy.
ekk..not real scene..just hiasan 


Kemarin kami ada kenduri di rumah pakcik. Ada baca doa selamat..dan juga lembu untuk disembelih SO me and my  family datang awal untuk pigi tolong-tolong. Mestilah kan, sesama saudara mesti PEGI TOLONG. Klau tidak, apalah nama bersaudara ni kan?
 Selepas lembu tu disembelih, makcik-makcik pun pegi potong daging-dagingnya di luar.. woo! i tell you, there's a lot of blood.. -___-' seronok!  makes me a little bit nervous. But hey, memang gitula bah kan klau mau makan lembu tu.. You've got to slice and dice! >.> what am i talking about??


  Then pastu kan... saya pun pigilah help-help cuci-cuci the pirings, sebab at that time, takde pisau.. Jadi itu jaklah kerja yang available untuk ditolong..


skip cuci piring, lets go forward to the real point.
bila dah abis kan cuci-cuci, saya dan cousin pun  pergi di luar dapur and duduk-duduk.. rehat jap.
At the same time, we saw the cow's head.. :) and i was like "OoooOoh, gitu pula di dalam.." pastu saya touch skit.. waa! haha.. ada rasa geli ada rasa exited sbab best dapat discover whats inside.. Tidak lama kemudian, abah pun datang. Dia bilang kepala ni blum habis lagi. Masih perlu diambil some parts of it.. to cook later. Itu yang abah katalah.. :')

belik-belik, kepala lembu tu pun diambil kulitnya.. I just watch abah with the same feeling>>EXITED<< Cut,cut ,cut, nah saya tertumpu kepada sesuatu.. And i think i want to hold it and look it even more closer..
so i said, " abah, bleh minta mata lembu tu? " tapi dalam hati.. takut-takut juga.. Niat saya bukan nak main-main dengan haiwan punya body parts.. cuma ingin mengetahui lebih lanjut tentang sebuah biji mata lembu. ITU SAHAJA... but hehehe.. im still sorry lembu.. Then. abah ambik lah eyeball tu.. and handed to me.. And me and my cousin was like, " Iyan, kita sdg pegang mata lembu!" yes..yes.. for the first time in my life, i had experience of holding a cow's eyeball.. and it was.. really, thrilling?

So thats the end of the storeyy i guess. And yeah, i also take a photo of the eyeball. But i cant upload it here.. next time lah..( kalaulah ada juga orang yang sanggup mau tengo-__-)

To those who read this while eating, im really minta maaflah klau anda tercekikkah atau terbatuk.. comment sahaja kalau ada yek..  And sorry to the lembu punya eyeball,.. tak berniat untuk membelek-belek.. tangan dan hati ini mau sangat membelek.. Apa boleh buat? abah dah hulur dah, jadi ambiklah peluang untuk membelekmu for the first time.. :)

to dear kenduri,
 dengan izinNya, next time lagi ah..~
Lets turn another chapter~
Written at Saturday, 2 June 2012 | back to top

with the name of Allah,
ekk, ginilah suasana di belakang rumah saya suasana yang tenangkan?


yah, for this lovely moment, and for this lovely day.. haha, i'll write something that i think i wanted to do it for a LONG TIME a go...


ok..here it goes, 


I know that i was getting older and older, i said "hey iyan, are you really growing up? it seems like you haven't yet..." hmmmmm i sigh to myself.

Why is it  I said that? Because, the more i get older, the more mistakes that i've done. Come to think of it.., yes i did SO MANY wrongs.. So i said again, "You cant keep doing mistakes Iyan, you've got to CHANGE man! Starting from when? Oh yeah, RIGHT NOW....."

Selama ini, mungkin kau telah buat banyak kesalahan, banyak dosa.. dan kini, bila kau sudah sedar, sudah IN YOUR SENSES,.. Jangan lagi ulang, jangan lagi buat kesalahan tu, bertaubatlah.. InsyaAllah kan Iyan, kau boleh tu..

Allah suka tau orang yang  bertaubat.. Buatlah betul..betul. Kalau mau berubah kan, mesti istiqamah, sabar banyak-banyak, lupakan masa yang silam dan jadikan pengajaran bagi kau.. Tidak susah tu, you just put all of your  passion and effort plus doa, inside your head and in that little heart of yours.. Keep that in mind.. Because anytime, Allah will open that heart.. to be really change from bad to good..

Iyan, you can do it.. I know you can.
there's  no problem for changing,
girl, just don't you quit on doing it 





For NOW
Written at Wednesday, 30 May 2012 | back to top

with the name of Allah,


ok..oklah Hi again,


based on the tittle, i dont know what to say, for now i mean.. Basicly i dont know what to write?
hmm yeah, how about i tell you about my dear old memories.. let's go back in time when i was still that what do they call it, oh yeah, NAUGHTY kid~ kamu tak tahu.. sbenarnya sy yg paling nakal dikalangan adik beradik saya nie..

So, as a nutshell (sehh tiba-tiba buat conclusion) im very much diffferent back then rather than i am now.. I change a lot. (tapi sebenarnya masih kuat main dengan kawan-kawan..Gila-gila  nakal-nakal lagi tue) Tapi yang bestkan time budak budak dulu.. tiada juga stress stress mau study, boleh main apa sahaja yang heart desire, selalu kena belanja, boleh diangkat bapa...banyak lagilah..                    It's just life.. and we must go on~

To childhood memories,
i miss you~ 
Read more »
pasal Benda tue..
Written at Tuesday, 29 May 2012 | back to top

with the name of Allah,

oklah..to dear readers(if theres any).. right now im gonna tell you about a little guy, named Poonam(sempena nama org Hindustan.hoho),
lol.. Poonam is our cat.. WAS our cat.. and you want to know why we dont want him(kah her i dont know) is because..........................

tadi pagi.. baru jak mau cuci kain, terHIDU something .... UeRK!
omg.. its a p.o.o.p! terus teriak.. Umi! Poonam berak lagi!.. pastu umi reply." itulah kucing tu.. tidak pandai-pandai berak how a cat should poop.. mau jugak berak dalam rumah.."
Then, siapa yang kena? harap kakak, hoi.. no way man. Adik? adik dah chow awal2 lagi sdh pigi rumah atok semalam ..(maklumlah cuti. Jadi mengisi kebosanan dgn hanging out with the other cousins).. So its up to me then to clean p.o.o.p tersebut.. sob,sob sedihkan? :P mintapujilah pula...
  After cuci tu, pigi sarapanlah.. then SUDDENLY, nampak c Poonam.. and you know what i said to him?
"Anti Poonam! you are grounded and forbidden to enter this house for a WHOLE DAY!" tapi, hehe..
pun bagaimana walau..kucing tetap kucing..faham kah tidak dorang masuk jak kalau sudah terbiasa.. KECUALILAH we all close the doors and dont give a chance to him to enter and poop around.. YEAH~
Unfotunately dear Iyan, its daylight.. its weird for you to shut up everything... so..Sabar jak..ok?

Poonam ni juga sebenarnya ada mama.. Then i think, kalaulah mama dia ni ajar anak dia di mana tempat yang betul utk 'landing'kan taik dia yg hangat2 tu.. kan BAGUS~ Tapi... entahlah. dunia haiwan dan dunia manusia berlainan.. Tambah-tambah lagi.. sekarang ni pun mama dia Jandi,( sempena nama org korea..hehe) sedang mengandung.. Nanti apalah mau jadi kalau makin banyak kilang2 pembuangan apa tu..hmm ya P.O.O.P...
 Appuda... sy pun tidak tau lagi~

Well, lets all blame poop here. Because of you, me and Poonam are enemies.
p/s: POOP also landed at my mom's cloth just then.. So, Poonam sleeps outside tonight.. I hope no more poop landing after this....  still im sorry Poonam. Its for your own good..
sleep tight,
Poonam the   cat  that always poop around the house:)) 
buddies like forever~
Written at | back to top

with the name of Allah,

so here i go again,... writing words.(of course) but only for a little while. 
  Before i go not blogging, i want to tell you about this friend.. My BEST F.R.I.E.N.D..

we start knowing each other since 3 years ago.. that is at boarding school! hurra to me..
ok..ok..dont get exited.  At first, we quite dont know that well..We just like, hi! bye! how are you?..
like that friend. So, thats not a best friend.. right? still just another person that you know only the name, age, and gender? lol.
 So...as times go by, we are  Form2 kids.. and fate, fate did make us in one class.. that year.
And starting last year, we got to know more, learn a lot from each other and PUFF! we are best buddies!!
 say Alhamdulillah. I thank Allah for that~

we share feelings, we played CRAZILY together, and all bunch of stuff a teenager like us would do..(u know what i mean).. not only both of us, but all of our friends too :) Its good when you reminisce the memories back..

then comes year 2012, fate again separate us.. :( shes at another class and im at another class.. but its a good thing that our class aren't that far. Cuz i can visit her during recess or anytime we are free.. 
And now, we are still doing happy and sometimes crazy things together. hee~

Btw, shes one of the reason why i made up my mind and made a blog myself.. So Blame her ok?

haha... if only you read this kid, i hope you're smiling right now.. or just tersengih-sengih.. 

And kid, im so grateful for having you as a friend and for having you in mylife.. 
Alhamdulillah i say, for US untill today~      
Thanks  FAB:) 

dalam diam
Written at | back to top

With the name of Allah

tadi pagi.. saya buat salah. Satu kesalahan yg sy telah buat berulang2 kali....
    rasanya orang tidak kisah.. tapi Tuhan? Tuhan memang tahupun.. tapi sedih. dah buat salah, saya buat lagi.

dengan umur 15 tahun ni, sy sdh tahu..sdh jelas yang sy buat itu satu perbuatan yang sungguh..
SALAH.
tapi.. manusia yang lemah yang lalai macam sayani susah untuk sedarkan diri..

Hey! wake up iyan.. bertaubatlah.. sbelum semuanya terlambat. Jangan kau menyesal bila pintu itu sdh tertutup,
baru mau menangis menyesal, baru mau bertaubat.. TIDAK. sorrylah...

Demi masa, sungguh manusia dalam kerugian yang besar kecuali orang2 yang beriman~
Jadi, berusahalah untuk memperbaiki diri.. JANGAN ulangi lagi..
   Bertaubatlah betul2... Sesungguhnya Allah suka orang2 yang taubat nasuha~
  InsyaAllah,

can do it